I've decided to stop thinking about why I should be a Christian, and how to be a Christian, and what difference it makes and all of that, and just do the simplest thing I can think to do - read the Bible. I might find some answers, and I might not, but I think that's okay. Maybe some other day I'll worry about all of the philosophical stuff, but for now I think I'll just give in to the fact that I've been a Christian for as long as I can remember, and it seems to have worked out okay so far. Lately I had been thinking that it was just as easy to not be a "real" Christian, but I've realized that without a daily relationship with God, the only thing constant in my life are my mood swings and my inability to grasp what is really valuable. Then, I read someone's thoughts about loving others in the way that God loves me, and I realized that I've lost touch with what God's love is like. How can my love for my husband be a representation of God's love when I haven't allowed myself to know God's love, or learned how to practice it? So... I dug out my Bible - The Message version just for kicks, and started in Matthew. Already, I have discovered several truths that speak directly to me (my thoughts are in parenthesis):
"It takes more than bread to stay alive. It takes a steady stream of words from God's mouth." (Sure, food will keep me alive. But in order to really live life to the fullest, I need to hear all that God is saying to me.)
"You're blessed when you get your inside world - your mind and heart - put right. Then you can see God in the outside world." (Pretty obvious... and yet, I often expect God to show up in the world around me, even when I'm not purposefully seeking him out in my own life.)
"Your eyes are windows into your body. If you open your eyes wide in wonder and belief, your body fills up with light. If you live squinty-eyed in greed and distrust, your body is a dank cellar. If you pull the blinds on your windows, what a dark life you will have!" (Just like I hate having the blinds closed in my dark little living room when it is a perfectly sunny day outside...I don't want to miss out on the brightness of life just because I don't bother to open my eyes. And opening my eyes doesn't mean figuring everything out. It just means believing...simple as that.)
"Don't look for shortcuts to God. The market is flooded with sure-fire, easygoing formulas for a successful life that can be practiced in your spare time. Don't fall for that stuff, even though crowds of people do. The way to life - to God! - is vigorous and requires total attention." (So, I have to put some effort into this relationship. But I think that God responds to even my simplest efforts, like reading a little bit of his Word.)
And a few things that offer a practical challenge for my everyday life...
"Don't pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults..."
"Ask yourself what you want people to do for you, then grab the initiative and do it for them."
(This is basically the golden rule that we've all heard about a bazillion times. However, I had always thought of it as a reactive kind of thing. This paraphrase helped me to see it in a new, proactive way.)
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